Chapter 32

Reality sets in when you find yourself in a Police station.

I have to take a breathalyzer. We have definitely established that I am drunk. In fact there is no question in my mind and I am sure there is none in the arresting officers mind how this test is going to turn out.

I haven't had a drink now in probably 2 hours.

I blow twice the legal limit.

I am sure I was in the .20 range when I was behind the wheel.

Seeing this I just start crying.

I tell the cop how sorry I am. I can only imagine how many times he has heard this before. I am no longer in any mood to joke around.

I don't have to spend the night in jail.

I am allowed to take a cab home. I stumble into my kitchen when I get home and hope that I have beer in the fridge.

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How do you plead?

Guilty your Honor.

The judge says that they will give me one chance to complete a diversion program. My License is going to be suspended for a full year.

I am happy to take that sentence.

I need to be able to drive so I get a hardship permit. This basically allows me to drive a set path to and from work and to and from my diversion program. I can drive once a week to get groceries and that's it.

If I get pulled over any other time I am screwed.

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Diversion is an interesting program.

You are required to go to AA meetings every week. You check in every week before your diversion group and they will tell you if they are going to give you a UA or not. You aren't allowed to drink or use drugs for a year.

I can't fail a UA. This isn't like a scheduled UA you take for a job. You know when you take these so you can do the necessary "studying" so can pass. I am amazed at how easy it is to pass a UA when you know when you are getting it.

A surprise urinalysis can ruin your day.

Everyone that is in the diversion program has been caught drinking and driving. Every single one of them, including myself will say that they are not alcoholics. It is seriously one big joke.

I drink every day except the day before diversion. Alcohol doesn't stay in your system long enough to be positive in a UA. On the first day of diversion they tested me to see where all my other levels were. My every day pot smoking had left me with plenty of THC in my system. They advised me that it better be decreased the next test or I was going back to the judge.

Going back to a judge with a failed diversion is not a good thing.

I hate diversion. I hate going to it. I sign my sheet every week that says I have attended my mandatory AA meeting.

I lie every week.

I don't go to one.

I don't think anyone does.

I am still convinced that I might be able to control my drinking. I have tried so many times to stop but I just got a DUI and that HAS to make me change my ways.

It has to.

Doesn't it?