Thanks everyone
**** UPDATE****
If you are just reading this page for the first time I want to welcome you to my life. This website is actually a full book. It is my own story of pain, redemption and salvation through Christ.
I am a drug addict.
I am an alcoholic.
I am a believer in Jesus Christ.
Please feel free to read my story. I wrote it to show the change in my life and to show that God can take you from darkness if you allow Him.
Many people have emailed me wanting to know what happens after this story ends in Russia. If you haven't read the whole book I would suggest that you do before you continue reading here. You can follow the links on the sidebar. Click on the lowest chapter and continue until you hit "Chapter 1".
This whole journey of writing this book was nothing like I expected it to be. I started writing because I felt I had a story that should be told. I had gone through some serious pain in my life because of addiction and I was saved through an honest relationship with Jesus Christ. To not tell the story would be dishonoring to God.
I had no idea what I was writing when I started. I just started it one day and it consumed me. In some ways it has been great and in other ways it has been two months of reliving quite a bit of pain. I have had some rough days because of this book. I have sat and cried many times over writing it. In some ways it was a final push to purge the pain and sin of my past. To face it all one more time now that it is approaching four years since I went to rehab. To face it as a new man, one who has dedicated his life to serve God to the best of my ability. To let it all go.
I have been humbled by the response to this book. I had no idea that I was going to be getting so many emails from people telling me about their own lives and their own struggles. Each of you that has written me I want you to know that I have prayed for you and your situations. Any of the goodness and strength that you might have obtained from this writing is not from me. I can't take any credit for that. I wrote what God put on my heart and I wrote what I went through to the best that my memory could grasp. A wise man named Dale once told me that the beauty I saw in him was only a reflection of his ability to let God in enough to let him shine. The honor in my story doesn't go to me, it goes to God. Without God this story would have ended in a tragic way. The story is one that I hope shows HIS strength and NOT mine. The main thing I did was have faith.
I came to believe.
I am still currently a worship leader at the same church. This church continues to grow and in the four short years of it's existence has planted three other churches. I lead worship every Friday night and I also lead 3 services on the first Sunday of every month. I am no longer at the job I had in the story. I actually lost the job I held for five years three days after I bought my first home. That was a little over a year ago. I had no idea how I was going to survive after losing a pretty high paying job. The truth is that God provided for me. I took a job as a mortgage broker and this year I made about 1/4 of the income I did from the previous years. God taught me how to make do without the excess income I use to have. Money is money and it isn't high on my priority list.
I am involved in the church as much as I can be. On the Sundays that I don't lead worship I take care of the 2 and 3 year olds at our church. I am "Uncle Steve" to a whole lot of beautiful children. It gives me a chance to love on the little ones and it gives rest to my heart that so longs to be a daddy. Like all of us I am just trying to listen to what God's will is in my life. Maybe I am destined to be single forever and I am trying to be ok with that. I haven't dated in a very long time. I am working on the most important relationship first, my relationship with God.
I have never seen or heard from my ex-wife. I did hear that she remarried and I still pray for her and her family. I wish nothing but the best for her. I hope that God has reached her heart in the same way that he has reached mine.
Cozmo and I are the best of friends. That isn't ever gonna change.
Mark and Joe and I still are playing music and trying to figure out what is God's plan for us. We have played together for eight years. Right now we are fully concentrating on being accountable Godly men. We meet weekly to go through the book "Measure of a Man" which teaches men how to achieve the traits that Godly men have as outlined by Paul in the Bible. It is an amazing book and an even more amazing journey.
I haven't seen Lacey for a long time. She did get married though. She married Aaron from rehab! Can ya believe it!! I am totally happy for them. I wish years of happiness to them. God bless them!
Right now I am just trying to figure out what to do with this thing. I think I am going to have to go back and change names to protect the "innocent". I have been thinking about that a lot lately. I don't want to cause harm by writing this book. None of it was meant to be demeaning or vengeful. I just wanted to tell the whole story so that maybe someone might relate to it. So they might see a hope in their own darkness.
I have a few people reading this as a whole. I am getting input on how to best put it together to maybe get it published. I just want it to be used for as much good as God allows.
It feels very weird to be done with this. I just didn't want to carry it out to a point of "boring". I felt that ending the book in Russia really showed how far God can take a willing man/woman.
If you want you can go to my other blog "Following God's Will" and follow my story from there. I have pictures of my mission trip from Russia and stories. It has a day to day of what has been going through my mind since this story ended.
None of our stories is ever really over.
Maybe it's only begun...
With Love,
Steve
This Book is going to be published. I will be required to take down this work "as a whole" very soon. If you are currently in the process of reading this let me know and I will get you the rest.
GOD IS GOOD!!!!
9/11/06 -SteveIf you are just reading this page for the first time I want to welcome you to my life. This website is actually a full book. It is my own story of pain, redemption and salvation through Christ.
I am a drug addict.
I am an alcoholic.
I am a believer in Jesus Christ.
Please feel free to read my story. I wrote it to show the change in my life and to show that God can take you from darkness if you allow Him.
Many people have emailed me wanting to know what happens after this story ends in Russia. If you haven't read the whole book I would suggest that you do before you continue reading here. You can follow the links on the sidebar. Click on the lowest chapter and continue until you hit "Chapter 1".
This whole journey of writing this book was nothing like I expected it to be. I started writing because I felt I had a story that should be told. I had gone through some serious pain in my life because of addiction and I was saved through an honest relationship with Jesus Christ. To not tell the story would be dishonoring to God.
I had no idea what I was writing when I started. I just started it one day and it consumed me. In some ways it has been great and in other ways it has been two months of reliving quite a bit of pain. I have had some rough days because of this book. I have sat and cried many times over writing it. In some ways it was a final push to purge the pain and sin of my past. To face it all one more time now that it is approaching four years since I went to rehab. To face it as a new man, one who has dedicated his life to serve God to the best of my ability. To let it all go.
I have been humbled by the response to this book. I had no idea that I was going to be getting so many emails from people telling me about their own lives and their own struggles. Each of you that has written me I want you to know that I have prayed for you and your situations. Any of the goodness and strength that you might have obtained from this writing is not from me. I can't take any credit for that. I wrote what God put on my heart and I wrote what I went through to the best that my memory could grasp. A wise man named Dale once told me that the beauty I saw in him was only a reflection of his ability to let God in enough to let him shine. The honor in my story doesn't go to me, it goes to God. Without God this story would have ended in a tragic way. The story is one that I hope shows HIS strength and NOT mine. The main thing I did was have faith.
I came to believe.
I am still currently a worship leader at the same church. This church continues to grow and in the four short years of it's existence has planted three other churches. I lead worship every Friday night and I also lead 3 services on the first Sunday of every month. I am no longer at the job I had in the story. I actually lost the job I held for five years three days after I bought my first home. That was a little over a year ago. I had no idea how I was going to survive after losing a pretty high paying job. The truth is that God provided for me. I took a job as a mortgage broker and this year I made about 1/4 of the income I did from the previous years. God taught me how to make do without the excess income I use to have. Money is money and it isn't high on my priority list.
I am involved in the church as much as I can be. On the Sundays that I don't lead worship I take care of the 2 and 3 year olds at our church. I am "Uncle Steve" to a whole lot of beautiful children. It gives me a chance to love on the little ones and it gives rest to my heart that so longs to be a daddy. Like all of us I am just trying to listen to what God's will is in my life. Maybe I am destined to be single forever and I am trying to be ok with that. I haven't dated in a very long time. I am working on the most important relationship first, my relationship with God.
I have never seen or heard from my ex-wife. I did hear that she remarried and I still pray for her and her family. I wish nothing but the best for her. I hope that God has reached her heart in the same way that he has reached mine.
Cozmo and I are the best of friends. That isn't ever gonna change.
Mark and Joe and I still are playing music and trying to figure out what is God's plan for us. We have played together for eight years. Right now we are fully concentrating on being accountable Godly men. We meet weekly to go through the book "Measure of a Man" which teaches men how to achieve the traits that Godly men have as outlined by Paul in the Bible. It is an amazing book and an even more amazing journey.
I haven't seen Lacey for a long time. She did get married though. She married Aaron from rehab! Can ya believe it!! I am totally happy for them. I wish years of happiness to them. God bless them!
Right now I am just trying to figure out what to do with this thing. I think I am going to have to go back and change names to protect the "innocent". I have been thinking about that a lot lately. I don't want to cause harm by writing this book. None of it was meant to be demeaning or vengeful. I just wanted to tell the whole story so that maybe someone might relate to it. So they might see a hope in their own darkness.
I have a few people reading this as a whole. I am getting input on how to best put it together to maybe get it published. I just want it to be used for as much good as God allows.
It feels very weird to be done with this. I just didn't want to carry it out to a point of "boring". I felt that ending the book in Russia really showed how far God can take a willing man/woman.
If you want you can go to my other blog "Following God's Will" and follow my story from there. I have pictures of my mission trip from Russia and stories. It has a day to day of what has been going through my mind since this story ended.
None of our stories is ever really over.
Maybe it's only begun...
With Love,
Steve
posted by steve at 1:50 PM
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